Letting go is a very healthy option and like many health options we know it is good for us and yet we are not always 100% committed to make the changes for our own good.
The steps required to change yourself (in whatever way you wish to change yourself) can only be made by you.
This is reassuring to know because that means you are not reliant on someone else or your outer circumstances changing it is an inner and personal job.
The Letting go Mind Map uses many Acronyms to aid recall.
I successfully used acronyms such as the ones in this Mind Map to overcome my own internal problems which were predominantly thought-based, so I can vouch from experience that they do work.
If you are committed to making positive change and letting go I recommend trying acronyms and creating your own Mind Maps that will assist you in achieving your goals and intentions.
Letting go is very similar to forgiveness in that you can worry over something for ages, years even, or you can worry for a minute or two, get over it and move on.
Forgiveness as with Letting go is the healthy option.
The change will only come when you finally let go.
If you cannot do it yourself please seek professional help.
I am not a professional I share advice gleaned through direct experience and I fully understand that everyone has unique and individual circumstances.
You can invent your own acronyms to suit your personal circumstances and the things you wish to remind yourself to let go of.
Here are the examples I used in the Mind Map with brief explanations of what and why I created them.
Problems Always Stem from Thought
Naturally, this isnt always the case, however, if you reflect deeply often what is perceived as a problem is little more than a thought or assumption that the mind likes to validate. Investigate for yourself to see if this is true for you.
Past Old Repetitive Known
When identifying thoughts and investigating whether they are a habit, feeling, emotion etc it is helpful to notice if your thought is lodged in the past. Is it an old story you keep revisiting, a repetitive thought that is getting you nowhere in short, is it a thought that you know and realise is either non-productive or negative or both.
By questioning your thoughts and being aware of them you can detach from the negative thoughts and focus on more valuable, productive and positive thoughts.
Jealousy, Anger and Greed
Noticing your emotions and thoughts as events happen you can quickly identify what type of thought it is that you are having and that helps you to not get sucked into a story that holds you trapped.
For example; if you notice yourself becoming jealous you can investigate that thought asking yourself why you are feeling that way the same goes for anger and greed and many other inner reactions very often thought-based.
When you investigate honestly and deeply you will find that almost all of the negative thoughts are illusion based.
Replace Attention Focus Thought
Your thinking expands, a bit like throwing fuel on a fire.
You can choose to replace your thoughts; rather than repeating old, repetitive or negative thoughts that are bothering you.
You can become more aware of your thinking effortlessly direct part of your attention onto your thinking at all times, so that you are not swept away and at the mercy of your internal dialogue.
Choose what you focus on rather than fighting your thoughts, allow them in, see them as non-problematic and make the decision to follow only the thoughts that give you value and peace.
Finally, realise thoughts are only thoughts; like clouds passing by in the sky. Another idea is viewing thoughts as snow as your thoughts build up imagine they are snowballs that join and get bigger and bigger and if left to their own devices they may well become an avalanche!
Ifs and Maybes
As you watch your thoughts, look out for sneaky words that lead you astray such as ifs and maybes it will help you become aware that what follows might not be worth following up on as it could simply be conjecture.
You could what if for the rest of your life without necessarily getting anywhere.
When you use the word maybe it pretty much says and now I am in guessing mode.
Buts Are Nuts
This brilliant idea came from a book called The Impact Code by Nigel Risner
If you use the word but you have practically wiped out everything you just said prior to the word but.
Many times I have seen this in action – often the words after a but contradict what was said before, but then again that could be quite wrong!
Positive Useful Matters Productive
Important Right Opportunity Now
This is a long acronym and perhaps less practical although each element does have great meaning.
Letting go is about looking at where you are focusing your thoughts and actions.
The pump iron acronym looks at a handful of the many possible areas to consider.
Each word offers a question to ask yourself such as:
Is what you are doing or thinking positive?
Is what you are doing or thinking useful?
Does what you are doing or thinking matter?
Is what you are doing or thinking productive?
Is what you are doing or thinking important?
Is what you are doing or thinking an opportunity?
Is what you are doing or thinking now orientated?
Focus Upon Now
Coming back to the present moment (a moment you cannot leave other than via your thoughts) is crucial to letting go.
Ask yourself honestly where what you need to let go of is?
Is it now?
Choose Only Inspiring Labels
A lot of your inner talk consists of a bunch of labels.
When you watch your thoughts you will quickly notice that you often add a label without knowing if it is correct or not.
It can also have a bearing on your level of happiness:
Are you focusing on what is right or what is wrong?
If you really watch your thoughts you will see how a flurry of labels (I dont know the collective term for a group of labels and flurry sounds great!) can quickly add up to what you perceive to be a miserable day!
If you track back and honestly ask yourself How did I get here? you may notice it started with an insignificant event or judgment.
The Tools branch of the Letting Go Mind Map is a quick summary of the key points and some extra tools for helping you let go such as:
Redirecting your attention, habits and focus
Replacing old, repetitive or non-productive thoughts
Clearing the air by talking things through with others or writing things down and analysing your thoughts, feelings and emotions to identify what it really is that you need to let go of or forgive.
The 5W 1H system can also be used for investigation.
Letting go is something you need to be 100% committed to, starting from now.
Whether you let go in small chunks and build up until you are completely free or decide to let go in an instant is up to you.
Often the effort required is the same, whether letting go now or next year, so do yourself a favour, take action get over it and move on!
Forget the excuses and the buts:
Focus on what you do want rather than what you dont.
Put your efforts into something that really matters and if it isnt positive, dont be surprised if you keep stirring the same old pot and getting nowhere.
The happiness and enjoyment of your life depends on it.
Your questions, suggestions and comments are welcome.